I Remember Tatang

Posted on July 31, 2015 by Spirit Moments

Sometimes, it seems, that the people who are closest to us are the same people we know the least. People would often first trust a complete stranger who impresses rather than a neighbor who has been helping them out over the years. They’d rather listen and heed the words of some famous man rather than seek the wisdom of a former teacher or even a former superior.

I often think of Tatang these days. And I realize how little I really knew my own father. It might be my failing memory but I do not remember too many stories or anecdotes with and about him. I do not know the pains and struggle he went through raising us up. I knew snippets of his joys and successes. He took great pride in his being a teacher. He was a member of their faculty choir and he relished that. He had a few friends and would rather spend time with his family.

And yet, he is constantly present, in my mind, in my heart and in my life. I look at myself in the mirror these days and I see Tatang, not myself. I sometimes catch myself just lying in bed and just looking into vacant space but with a contented smile as I think about the blessings I have received. That is what I remember Tatang very often during quiet moments. I love playing pranks on Jonathan and Jane and I remember Tatang’s childlike playfulness. He rose above his humble beginnings and peasant roots to raise us up in relative comfort and well-being. That is the story of my life – a small town boy who did pretty well in the big city. I look at my pictures and I see his winsome smile on my face. I need no stories or anecdotes to remind me of Tatang. He lives in me and in my life.

I sometimes feel that God is distant or even absent in my life. There are days His words leave me cold and indifferent. There are times I cry to feel His presence and I feel like crying in the wind. Yet, I only need to be silent and quiet to realize that He is always there with me, within me, around me, enfolding me. I need no proofs, no thunder and lightning, no visions nor ecstacy, to know my God is here. He simply is – in my here and now.

Sing with joy to God our help.
~ Psalm 81
Jesus came to his native place and taught the people in their synagogue.
They were astonished and said,
“Where did this man get such wisdom and mighty deeds?
Is he not the carpenter’s son?
Is not his mother named Mary
and his brothers James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas?
Are not his sisters all with us?
Where did this man get all this?”
And they took offense at him.
But Jesus said to them,
“A prophet is not without honor except in his native place
and in his own house.”
And he did not work many mighty deeds there
because of their lack of faith.
Matthew 13:54-58
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Thinking of the End-time

Posted on July 30, 2015 by Spirit Moments

As I approach the evening of my life, I often think of things people my age think about: what else? how will it end? when will it come? what would I be doing then? I sometimes think of my “final exam”: will I be among the good fish that will be put into buckets or will I be among the bad that will be thrown away? will I be among the the sheep or among the goats? will I be asked to step to the right side or the left side?

In my life, I have not been totally good. But I have not been totally bad either. I have tried to live a righteous life. I believe I often succeeded. But there were times, I failed and failed miserably. I have had many moments that I truly loved and generously served others. But there have been instances too that I have been totally selfish. Knowing that I am such a mixed bag of the good, the bad and even the ugly, I put myself totally in the hands of God’s love and mercy.

And as my coming days are now a lot less than the days that I have lived, I want to make every moment count. I do not dream of changing the world anymore. I do not dream of completing one grand project by which I will be long remembered. I do not even hope to go out with one big bang.

I just want to have just one more game to play with Jonathan and one more story to share with Jane that they will long remember and cherish long after I am gone. I just want one more tight embrace or a long phone conversation with some estranged or distant relative to relish one last time the joys of family. I just want one more walk or hike with friends in the mountains or by the waters and to delight in the wonders and wisdom in nature and her treasures. I just want one more quiet moment with Anabelle, holding hands, watching the sun set, not saying a word but simply reliving in our shared heartbeats all the joys and sorrows that we have lived through together. And if I can have several of these again before I go, then I shall have no regrets leaving.

How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord, mighty God! ~ Psalm 84
Jesus said to the disciples: “The Kingdom of heaven is like a net thrown into the sea, which collects fish of every kind. When it is full they haul it ashore and sit down to put what is good into buckets. What is bad they throw away. Thus it will be at the end of the age. The angels will go out and separate the wicked from the righteous and throw them into the fiery furnace, where there will be wailing and grinding of teeth.” “Do you understand all these things?” They answered, “Yes.” And he replied, “Then every scribe who has been instructed in the Kingdom of heaven is like the head of a household who brings from his storeroom both the new and the old.” When Jesus finished these parables, he went away from there. Matthew 13:47-53
 
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Temperaments And The Spiritual Life

Posted on July 29, 2015 by Spirit Moments

Martha must be the patron saint of OC people. She is the typical homemaker, practical and always busy doing something. When Jesus came visiting, she would go immediately to meet and welcome Him and then busy herself in the kitchen to prepare something to eat. She wanted everything in order and planned, always looking at things as they should be. Like, she told Jesus, “If you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

In contrast, Mary was the more spontaneous person. She loved just spending time with Jesus, listening to His stories and telling Him hers. She would simply go with the flow, allowing serendipity to take over. She could spend hours doing nothing but simply being with Jesus.

Our temperaments are our ways to God. A bubbly and spontaneous personality helps one to see the joys and blessings there are in living. An industrious and diligent personality enables on to work hard in the service of others and for one’s salvation. It is also through our temperament that God speaks to us. He can speak to us in our joyful moments and spontaneous events. He can speak to us even as we work and are busy doing things.

Holy is the Lord our God.
~ Psalm 99
Many of the Jews had come to Martha and Mary
to comfort them about their brother [Lazarus, who had died].
When Martha heard that Jesus was coming,
she went to meet him; but Mary sat at home.
Martha said to Jesus,
“Lord, if you had been here,
my brother would not have died.
But even now I know that whatever you ask of God,
God will give you.”
Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise.”
Martha said to him, “I know he will rise,
in the resurrection on the last day.”
Jesus told her, “I am the resurrection and the life;
whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will live,
and anyone who lives and believes in me will never die.
Do you believe this?”
She said to him, “Yes, Lord.
I have come to believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God,
the one who is coming into the world.”
John 11:19-27
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Of Wheat And Weeds

Posted on July 28, 2015 by Spirit Moments

In every field where wheat grows, there will be weeds. There will always be more wheat than there are weeds; just as there is more goodness in the world than there is evil. Still, evil is very real and it exists in the world.

It is evil that there are terrorists who prey on the innocent and the defenseless to strike fear into the hearts of their enemies. It is evil there are bankers who will demand their pound of flesh in interest payments, even if it means imposing severe conditions on a whole nation. It is evil that businessmen wantonly destroy and ravish nature in their pursuit of ever increasing profits. It is evil that there are people who will not spare even a moment’s thought and just go ahead and harm and even kill people.

But still there is more good than evil in this world. That we are still around and have not self-destructed is a testament to men’s inherent goodness. There is goodness and love in the millions of couples who daily struggle to provide a loving home where to raise their children. There is goodness and dedication in teachers who toil everyday to teach the young and the ignorant. There is goodness and generosity in the many doctors who spend long hours everyday to heal the sick and keep people healthy. There is goodness and creativity in builders and engineers who constantly find and devise ways of making our world a safer, cleaner and better place to live in. There is goodness and heroism in the many people who cross the street to reach out and help neighbors in need.

As a human being with the the capacity to choose, I can be either a stalk of wheat or a weed. I have chosen not to add to the pain and misery in this world. I have chosen to give love instead of hatred. I have chosen to be a force for good rather than of evil. And for the moments that I have not been faithful to my choice, I trust in the Lord’s kindness and mercy.

The Lord is kind and merciful.
~ Psalm 103
Jesus dismissed the crowds and went into the house.
His disciples approached him and said,
“Explain to us the parable of the weeds in the field.”
He said in reply, “He who sows good seed is the Son of Man,
the field is the world, the good seed the children of the Kingdom.
The weeds are the children of the Evil One,
and the enemy who sows them is the Devil.
The harvest is the end of the age, and the harvesters are angels.
Just as weeds are collected and burned up with fire,
so will it be at the end of the age.
The Son of Man will send his angels,
and they will collect out of his Kingdom
all who cause others to sin and all evildoers.
They will throw them into the fiery furnace,
where there will be wailing and grinding of teeth.
Then the righteous will shine like the sun
in the Kingdom of their Father.
Whoever has ears ought to hear.”
Matthew 13:36-43
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Saccharomyces Cerevisiae

Posted on July 27, 2015 by Spirit Moments

It would be difficult to imagine life without Saccharomyces cerevisiae. That is the scientific name of the common yeast. It is essential for baking, brewing and winemaking. Through the process of fermentation, which produces energy and protein necessary for living tissues, it makes possible many of the things we take for granted in our everyday lives. In the grandeur that is life, it is the small things like yeast that makes life what it is.

The smallest of seeds becomes the biggest of trees. Dust from the stars evolve into a conscious intelligence. And this amazing evolution happens in one insignificant planet revolving around an average star almost at the edge of a small galaxy, named by this conscious intelligence as the Milky Way.

Small though we are, our imaginations know no limit. We reach for the stars. Limited though we may be, we dream of a life and existence without limits. We dream of a heaven where there is life everlasting. Insignificant though we seem, we wonder in the vastness of the universe why we seem to be the only one of our kind. We try to search for intelligent consciousness elsewhere. But we have so far not been successful.

This cannot all be by accident. There has to be Someone behind all this. And if we are but a fleeting moment in the timeline all that exists, it is like an eternity of being, having experienced the blessings of existence and consciousness. It is reason enough to be grateful to whoever it is who made all this possible.

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good.
~ Psalm 106
Jesus proposed a parable to the crowds.
“The Kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed
that a person took and sowed in a field.
It is the smallest of all the seeds,
yet when full-grown it is the largest of plants.
It becomes a large bush,
and the birds of the sky come and dwell in its branches.”
He spoke to them another parable.
“The Kingdom of heaven is like yeast
that a woman took and mixed with three measures of wheat flour
until the whole batch was leavened.”
All these things Jesus spoke to the crowds in parables.
He spoke to them only in parables,
to fulfill what had been said through the prophet:
I will open my mouth in parables,
I will announce what has lain hidden from the foundation of the world.
Matthew 13:31-35
 
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How Do Miracles Happen?

Posted on July 26, 2015 by Spirit Moments
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As we were waiting for the mass to begin yesterday at the Saint Joseph Cathedral here in San Jose, my attention wandered to the altar and I started wondering: How many prayers of petition and supplications have been brought to this altar? How many joyful moments have been celebrated in this place?  How many people have come here in humility and gratitude for the blessings they have received? This altar has been the center and focus of a vibrant community of faith, where joys and happiness are multiplied  because they are shared and  where sorrows and pain are lessened because they are shared and divided.

A little boy shares what he has: five barley loaves and two fish. And Jesus is able to feed five thousand men, not yet counting the women and the children. And in the end, there were still twelve baskets of leftovers. Where there is openness to loving and sharing, there is enough for all our needs. Resources are multiplied and there is true abundance.  Where we are loathe to love and to share what we have, there is never enough to satisfy our selfish greed. There is scarcity.

And when people are willing and ready to love and share, miracles to happen: loaves and fish are multiplied; water is changed into wine; the dead are raised back to life; and people begin forgiving one another. This is what we bring to the altar: our lives to be shared in love. And we only need to sit back and watch and wait to see the magic and the miracles to happen.

The hand of the Lord feeds us; he answers all our needs.
~ Psalm 145
Then Jesus took the loaves, gave thanks,
and distributed them to those who were reclining,
and also as much of the fish as they wanted.
When they had had their fill, he said to his disciples,
“Gather the fragments left over,
so that nothing will be wasted.”
So they collected them,
and filled twelve wicker baskets with fragments
from the five barley loaves
that had been more than they could eat.
When the people saw the sign he had done, they said,
“This is truly the Prophet, the one who is to come into the world.”
Since Jesus knew that they were going to come and carry him off
to make him king,
he withdrew again to the mountain alone.
John 6:1-15
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Sahasrara

Posted on July 25, 2015 by Spirit Moments

Yesterday, I bumped the crown of my head real hard as I tried getting into a van. I am grateful I have always been hardheaded, otherwise I could have cracked my skull or even passed out. I ended up with a severe headache and a big lump on my head.

As I was nursing my hurting crown, I was reminded that this is the location of the seventh chakra according to Hindu tradition. The crown chakra, known as Sahasrara, is considered to be the center for trust, devotion, inspiration, happiness, and positivity. It is also believed to be the center for deeper connection with ourselves and deeper connection with a force of life that is greater than ourselves. It is the channel through which the life force of the universe flows into a human being and animates the other chakras.

I imagine now what happened on Pentecost, the Holy Spirit descending on the apostles as tongues of fire and resting on the crown of their heads. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, giving them the courage, inspiration and wisdom to go out and proclaim the Risen Lord. As I nurse this bump on the crown of my head, may I have a better connection with the Holy Spirit, with the LifeForce of the universe that I too may have the courage, inspiration and wisdom to proclaim my Risen Lord.

May I realize that seeking wealth power and fame is a fool’s quest for these things are all fleeting and ephemeral. They hold nothing but empty promises. But it is in the emptiness and nothingness and in my own nothingness that I will find the fulness of life.

May I realize that power is not the source of strength or control. Nor is the meaning of life to have others do things at my biding. Instead, the real source of power and control is putting myself in the service of others. It is in being a slave that I become truly a master of myself.

May I realize that with the random threads of my life I am actually weaving a beautiful tapestry; that through the many chance encounters in my life I am actually witnessing the unfolding of a great life story; that in the seemingly unconnected events of my experiences there is the inevitable unfolding of the person I have been created to be; that in His time my tears will be turned into joys and my joys will be multiplied a thousandfold.

Those who sow in tears shall reap rejoicing.
~ Psalm 126
The mother of the sons of Zebedee approached Jesus with her sons
and did him homage, wishing to ask him for something.
He said to her, “What do you wish?”
She answered him, “Command that these two sons of mine sit,
one at your right and the other at your left, in your Kingdom.”
Jesus said in reply, “You do not know what you are asking.
Can you drink the chalice that I am going to drink?”
They said to him, “We can.”
He replied, “My chalice you will indeed drink,
but to sit at my right and at my left, this is not mine to give
but is for those for whom it has been prepared by my Father.”
When the ten heard this, they became indignant at the two brothers.
But Jesus summoned them and said,
“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them,
and the great ones make their authority over them felt.
But it shall not be so among you.
Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you shall be your servant;
whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave.
Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served
but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Matthew 20:20-28
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Seeds and Sower

Posted on July 24, 2015 by Spirit Moments

I have been both seed and the sower.

When I look back at my years, I feel deeply grateful for and humbled by all the blessings that have come into my life. It has been a long way from Angeles in Pampanga to San Jose in California. And every step of the way there have been blessings and fruits unimaginable. Sometimes, I muse that if I had tried a little bit more, I could have so much more. But then again, I have been totally flummoxed by all that had happened in my life to even wish for more. And to think, it all started with a tiny seed. I am thankful to the Sower who planted me.

As I come to the end of the tree of my life, I pray and hope that somehow my trunk will provide lumber for some floors or posts for a home or perhaps be the block from which will emerge a lovely sculpture; that my branches will serve as thatches for a roof that will provide shade and shelter to a family or perhaps serve as fuel to give heat and warmth or help prepare some food; that my leaves and my bark may become some potion to help heal and rejuvenate some tired bodies. I pray that my death be as meaningful as my life has been fruitful.

I am also a sower. I have sown many seeds in my time. I have seen the fruits of my physical seeds unto the second generation. And I am mightily pleased by and proud of what I see. I have also sown seeds in other ways. Through my words and deeds, I have sown seeds among family, friends, colleagues and the many people whose lives I have touched. I pray for my family that the seeds of good deeds and kind words I have shared with them with great devotion and love may live forever in their hearts. I pray that the seeds I have sown in the hearts of friends, whether wittingly or unwittingly, may have made some moments in their lives happier and more memorable or some burdens and problems more bearable. I pray that the seeds I had given to my students, colleagues, clients, customers, comrades, partners, and people who have crossed my path have fallen on rich soil and have borne fruits and yielded a hundred or sixty or thirtyfold.

Lord, you have the words of everlasting life.
~ Psalm 19
Jesus said to his disciples:
“Hear the parable of the sower.
The seed sown on the path is the one who hears the word of the Kingdom
without understanding it,
and the Evil One comes and steals away
what was sown in his heart.
The seed sown on rocky ground
is the one who hears the word and receives it at once with joy.
But he has no root and lasts only for a time.
When some tribulation or persecution comes because of the word,
he immediately falls away.
The seed sown among thorns is the one who hears the word,
but then worldly anxiety and the lure of riches choke the word
and it bears no fruit.
But the seed sown on rich soil
is the one who hears the word and understands it,
who indeed bears fruit and yields a hundred or sixty or thirtyfold.”
Matthew 13:18-23
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Eyes And Ears

Posted on July 23, 2015 by Spirit Moments

If eyes were made for seeing,
why do I fail to see so many things?
I always wake up to a beautiful morning,
why do I fail to see beauty the rest of the day?

The eyes indeed were made for seeing,
why do I refuse to sometimes see?
I see people in need or in pain.
I turn my sight away so I don’t see them.

But it is not only with the eyes that I see.
I have a heart that helps me see even more clearly.
With the heart I can see the tears even before they fall
Or see that smile breaking for joys, big and small.

If ears were made for hearing,
then, why do I fail to hear so many things?
There is a tune that all creation sings.
There is a beat and rhythm in everything.

The ears indeed were made for hearing.
But sometimes I listen selectively.
I hear praises and accolades
But I never listen to others’ counsel and censure.

It is not only with the ears that I hear.
There is also a sense of hearing deep inside of me.
I can listen to that little voice whispering
“I am here with you till time everlasting.”

The disciples approached Jesus and said,
“Why do you speak to the crowd in parables?”
He said to them in reply,
“Because knowledge of the mysteries of the Kingdom of heaven
has been granted to you, but to them it has not been granted.
To anyone who has, more will be given and he will grow rich;
from anyone who has not, even what he has will be taken away.
This is why I speak to them in parables, because
they look but do not see and hear but do not listen or understand.
Isaiah’s prophecy is fulfilled in them, which says:

You shall indeed hear but not understand,
you shall indeed look but never see.
Gross is the heart of this people,
they will hardly hear with their ears,
they have closed their eyes,
lest they see with their eyes
and hear with their ears
and understand with their hearts and be converted
and I heal them.

“But blessed are your eyes, because they see,
and your ears, because they hear.
Amen, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people
longed to see what you see but did not see it,
and to hear what you hear but did not hear it.”
Matthew 13:10-17

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A Great Love Story

Posted on July 22, 2015 by Spirit Moments

I have often mused about the love story between Jesus and Mary Magdalene. Theirs must have been a wonderful relationship with a great deal of affection between the two of them. Jesus was a close friend of their family and He would often visit and spend, or waste, time with them. Mary would sit with Jesus and listen to his stories; while Martha was busy in the kitchen preparing something to eat and their brother Lazarus would hover around listening in.

Jesus was a major influence in the life of Mary Magdalene. She was a public sinner and was derided as such. But when she met Jesus, her life took a complete turn-around and she became one of the most faithful and devoted among the disciples. When all the others, including most of the apostles, abandoned Christ at His crucifixion; she was one of three women together with the beloved disciple who stayed. It was to her that the Risen Christ first revealed Himself to. And it was she that Christ asked to announce to the rest that He has risen.

Her story is the story of all those whose lives have been touched and changed by their encounter with Jesus: sinners changing for the better and changing not only their lives but even of those around them. It is a great love story that has been repeated in many lives, across the centuries and in many climes and places. It is a love story I have struggled all my life to live out.

The Lord gave them bread from heaven.
~ Psalm 78
Mary stayed outside the tomb weeping.
And as she wept, she bent over into the tomb
and saw two angels in white sitting there,
one at the head and one at the feet
where the Body of Jesus had been.
And they said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?”
She said to them, “They have taken my Lord,
and I don’t know where they laid him.”
When she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus there,
but did not know it was Jesus.
Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?
Whom are you looking for?”
She thought it was the gardener and said to him,
“Sir, if you carried him away,
tell me where you laid him,
and I will take him.”
Jesus said to her, “Mary!”
She turned and said to him in Hebrew,
“Rabbouni,” which means Teacher.
Jesus said to her,
“Stop holding on to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father.
But go to my brothers and tell them,
‘I am going to my Father and your Father,
to my God and your God.’”
Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples,
“I have seen the Lord,”
and then reported what he told her.
John 20:11-18
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