Spirit Moments | From minutes to moments . . . .

Spiritual Narcissism

Posted on March 28, 2013 by Spirit Moments

I realize that there is great danger in my spiritual life deteriorating into spiritual narcissism, being about myself, for myself and within myself. I cannot look at my prayer time as simply a feel-good moments of peace and quiet by myself and for myself. The love I profess for others cannot just remain a romantic ideal I enjoy mulling over and over again in my mind. I cannot read the scriptures just for the intellectual pleasure it brings me but I should allow it to change my life and my behavior and actions.

True love is unconditional and unconditional love is not just an intellectual affirmation of a truth. Truth is the congruence between what is real and what is in my mind. For my love to be true, I must express it in reality; I must make it real through my actions. Thus, love without action is like sounding gong – making a lot of noise but never efficacious. I cannot simply say to someone: “I love you and I will pray for you.” Telling someone you love them is important. It is an affirmation. Praying for someone is also important. I affirm before the Lord my concern for another person. But if my love and prayer stop there, not translated into tangible action, they become just like wisps of smoke floating hazily in the air and are soon gone.

I must believe that love and prayer expressed through actions become heroic. Even the simplest acts, such as doing little acts of service like driving the kids to school or cleaning the house or doing the laundry or preparing a meal, take on heroic proportions when done out of love, and this love-doing done with the consciousness of God’s involvement and presence in such simple and ordinary actions. Then, my love and prayers are for myself nor by myself nor within myself. But my actions become acts of love and prayer for others, about others and with others.

Anabelle would usually gargle with brine whenever she has a sore throat. She was doing that the other day by the kitchen sink with Jonathan nearby busy at his iPad. At the second gargling, Jonathan suddenly ran upstairs to get his Mommy, saying: “Mommy, Mommy, come down quickly. Lola is throwing up.” Such is love and concern translated into effective action.

After he had washed their feet, had put on his robe, and had returned to the table, he said to them, ‘Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord—and you are right, for that is what I am. So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you.
John 13:1-8,12-15

Posted in Discipleship, Faith, Life, Spirituality | Tagged Love, Prayer, Service | Comments Off

Betrayal and Forgiveness

Posted on March 27, 2013 by Spirit Moments

One of the most bitter human experiences possible is that of being betrayed. The betrayal becomes even more painful when it is done by a person one is close to. The trust and confidence that was there before is replaced by anger, pain and deep disappointment. One is totally at a loss why someone you love and trust could turn on you and cause such deep pain. Betrayal is one experience that is difficult to forget and to forgive.

And yet, I am also guilty of having betrayed friends, family and total strangers in my life. It hurts when it is done to me but there are moments when I am guilty of this terrible sin too. Often, because of fear or selfishness or pride or the desire to get even, I have betrayed people I care for. And because of shame over what I have done or pride or even misplaced self-righteousness, I find if difficult to own up and ask forgiveness for what I have done.

Judas betrayed Jesus and so did Peter. One has gone done in history to become the icon of betrayal. The other, repentant, has become the model for a contrite person who makes amends the rest of his life for the wrong he had done. Jesus, on the cross, had only forgiveness for those who have betrayed him and done him wrong.

I pray for humility and strength to be able to ask forgiveness for all those whose trust and confidence I have betrayed. I pray for generosity of heart and love to forgive all those who have betrayed me, whether for real or out of my selfish imaginings.

When it was evening, he took his place with the twelve; and while they were eating, he said, “Truly I tell you, one of you will betray me.” And they became greatly distressed and began to say to him one after another, “Surely not I, Lord?”
Matthew 26:14-25

Posted in Discipleship, Evil, Faith | Tagged Forgiveness, Generosity, Grace, Humility, Prayer | Comments Off

Ruminating on a Quote From Ralph Waldo Emerson

Posted on March 26, 2013 by Spirit Moments

Sow a thought and you reap an action.
All actions are born out of a thought, even seemingly spontaneous ones that happen in the blink of an eye. Malcolm Gladwell calls this rapid cognition. But not all thoughts bear fruit in action. Many thoughts remain and stay in the mind. Some become good intentions but are never executed into action. There is the saying that the road to hell is paved with good intention. Sometimes, we end up doing the opposite of our good intentions. Peter, ever the the brash and brusque person that he was, ended up denying Jesus despite his boast that he would lay down his life for the Master.

Sow an act and you reap a habit.
What I do changes me and what I do repeatedly shapes me. Such repeated actions form my habit. Aristotle, being the brilliant philosopher that he was, taught us that “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

Sow a habit and you reap a character.
Our habits make us. Or, if they are bad, they break us. It takes time to form our habits but once formed, they define who we are. Repeated acts of kindness and giving eventually make us good persons. Repeated acts of negativity eventually make us cynical and even bitter persons. Stephen Covey taught us: “Our character is basically a composite of our habits. Because they are consistent, often unconscious patterns, they constantly, daily, express our character.”

Sow a character and you reap a destiny.
Who we are determines the life we live. Character is destiny. A man of character has purpose and meaning in his life. Friedrich Nietzsche, quoted by Victor Frankl in his inspiring book Man’s Search for Meaning, taught us that “He who has a why to live can bear with almost any how.”

Simon Peter said to him, “Lord, where are you going?” Jesus answered, “Where I am going, you cannot follow me now; but you will follow afterwards.” Peter said to him, “Lord, why can I not follow you now? I will lay down my life for you.” Jesus answered, “Will you lay down your life for me? Very truly, I tell you, before the cock crows, you will have denied me three times.
John 13:31-38

Posted in Character, Spirituality | Tagged Choice, Discipline, Doing good, Wisdom | Comments Off

Love Dinner with Jesus: No Invitation Needed

Posted on March 25, 2013 by Spirit Moments

Among the best friends of Jesus had during his time here on earth were the sisters Mary and Martha and their brother Lazarus. Specially touching and poignant was the love and affection Mary had for Jesus – how she would waste her time and her things doting on Jesus. That started the rumor that they were lovers and maybe even had a child, the stuff of quite a number of recent conspiracy books and novels. But I love reading and reflecting on the stories about this family and their relationship with Jesus. It reminds and teaches me a lot about love.

I have always been enamored by love. In my youth, I was a starry eyed romantic. I often turned my thoughts trying to catch what the meaning of love is: sometimes ephemeral, oftentimes eternal – for love is often driven by emotions, therefore fleeting. Bit love is also a decision, therefore more lasting. I searched high and low: in books like the ‘Phenomenology of Love’ by Luijpen and ‘The Art of Loving’ by Erich Fromm, in relationships, in causes, in silence.

I have learned that love is all about seeing the truth and the reality in others, in seeing the beauty and the goodness in them beyond the grime, the wounds and the smell. Love is thinking less of myself and more of the other, more about the giving than the receiving. it is in being of service to the other. Love is sharing the laughter but also being there when the tears come. Love is sharing stories of joy and happiness but also sharing the silence when words are too inadequate to express the pain and the sorrow. Love is knowing the heart of the other person even before a single word is spoken. For love is express sometimes with words but often by a touch or an action.

The world understands love in a conditional way. the value of a person is conditioned by his possessions, his achievements and his productivity. Thus, the world finds it hard to love those without possessions like the poor and the homeless. The world finds it hard to make room and serve those without achievements like the widows and the orphans. The world finds it hard to be welcoming and accepting of those who are no longer or not yet productive like the elderly and the immigrants.

The love that Jesus taught us is unconditional, willing to lay down life for the sake of friends and family. All we need is to see the truth, the beauty and the goodness God has implanted in each one of us to realize we are all worth loving and living and even dying for. Now, if you will excuse me, I will go and join the dinner Lazarus and his sisters prepared for the Lord. I would love to see Mary wasting her perfumed oils, washing the feet of Jesus. Come along. Everyone is invited.

Six days before Passover Jesus came to Bethany, where Lazarus was, whom Jesus had raised from the dead. They gave a dinner for him there, and Martha served, while Lazarus was one of those reclining at table with him. Mary took a liter of costly perfumed oil made from genuine aromatic nard and anointed the feet of Jesus and dried them with her hair; the house was filled with the fragrance of the oil.
John 12:1-11

Posted in Encounter, Family, Friendship, Spirituality | Tagged Grace, Love, Wisdom | Comments Off

Nothing comes from nothing. No one gives what one does not have. These are some of the self-evident statements that have given me a lot of inspiration and consolation. There is so much beauty in nature. I love doing nature hikes. It is always a thrill for me and Anabelle to walk up a mountain trail and then enjoy the scenic vistas at the top; to tread along the beach and then be lulled by the peace and the rhythmic rolling in of the waves; to trace a path through a forested area and come upon all sorts of flowers; birds and the occasional wild animal. All this beauty did not come from nothing. There must be a Source. I love being with people. It is always a moving experience for me to spend or even waste time with a loved one; to listen to each life story that is unique and non-repeatable; to be touched by the kindness from a complete stranger or to receive help and support from someone when I least expect it; to be cradled in love and caring even deep inside I know I do not deserve it. All this goodness in people cannot be given nor shared unless it was there deep inside the person in the first place. Goodness comes from a Source.

The truth is that all this beauty and goodness come from the same Source. People know this truth in their heart of hearts. And when they do not acknowledge it, the rest of creation does so. One of my favorite scene in “Jesus Christ Superstar” is when JC rebuked the High Priest for telling him to keep his followers from making all the ruckus of proclaiming his goodness:
Why waste your breath moaning at the crowd?
Nothing can be done to stop the shouting
If every tongue were still the noise would still continue
The rocks and stones themselves would start to sing.

Ah, but how come there is also so much ugliness and mess in the world? Why is there pain and suffering, death and separation if the Source is all good and beautiful? This is where the cosmic drama of our salvation unfolds. Jesus on the cross shows us how to face up to and cope with pain and suffering, death and separation. Like him, we can conquer these things through the cross. The exuberance and exultation of Jesus as he made his entry into Jerusalem gives way to the seeming defeat and loss of Good Friday to finally climax in the glory of the Resurrection. This does not sit well with conventional human wisdom but this is the truth that is being proclaimed this Holy Week, beginning with Passion Sunday.

As he rode along, the people were spreading their cloaks on the road; and now as he was approaching the slope of the Mount of Olives, the whole multitude of his disciples began to praise God aloud with joy for all the mighty deeds they had seen. They proclaimed:
“Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord.
Peace in heaven and glory in the highest.”
Some of the Pharisees in the crowd said to him,
“Teacher, rebuke your disciples.”
He said in reply,
“I tell you, if they keep silent, the stones will cry out!”
Luke 19:28-40

Posted on March 24, 2013 by Spirit Moments | Comments Off

Why God Chose to Reveal Himself to Us

Posted on March 23, 2013 by Spirit Moments

In recent news, scientists have again verified the age of the universe: 13.8 billion years, give or take a few million years. In the vastness of this universe, the earth is but a pale blue dot, invisible to the naked eye. The earth and our solar system are 4.5 billion years old. Man, as the embodied consciousness that he is, has been around only in the last million years or so. In this great scheme of things, we are but a moment in time. And in this great expanse of time and space, it is highly unlikely we are the only intelligent life forms. Searching for life in this vast universe is like looking for the proverbial needle in the haystack. But might it also not be possible that indeed we are the only one of our kind in all of creation? Is it really just conceit on the part of man to think so? Or is it the reality? Even the Psalmist from of old had been wondering on the same question:

When I look at thy heavens, the work of thy fingers,
the moon and the stars which thou hast established;
what is man that thou art mindful of him,
and the son of man that thou dost care for him?

My hear breaks and it bleeds whenever I see my loved ones troubled, their souls in turmoil and their spirits anguished. If God were anything like us humans, I can imagine how disappointed he must be looking at our world. It is a messy, troubled place. And yet, things have always worked out for the better. I live a better life than my father and grandfather did. My sons and their children will have a better life than I have. In spite of all the troubles and turmoils, things do work out for the better in the long run.

There is so much to understand about life. We would get rid of the difficult parts if we could, thinking this is what life is all about. Yet, it is the difficult moments in life that enable us to get to the next peak experience. We would get rid of pain and suffering. Yet, time and again, it is pain and suffering that brings out the best in us.

God’s ways are not our ways. That is why he chose to reveal himself to us. For on our own, it would be very difficult if not well nigh impossible to even come upon on just an iota of understanding about him. Without him, we know nothing.

But one of them, Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, said to them, “You know nothing at all! You do not understand that it is better for you to have one man die for the people than to have the whole nation destroyed.”
John 11:45-56

Posted in Faith, Life, Science, Spirituality | Tagged Beginnings, Eternity, Grace, Wisdom | Comments Off

My Connection to My Infinite Source

Posted on March 22, 2013 by Spirit Moments

Imagine a factory somewhere in China churning out electronic gadgets (iPhones, iPads, iPods) by the millions, then shipping out these goods throughout the world to eagerly waiting customers. The gadgets are all perfect – manufactured according to strict specifications and then checked for conformity using even stricter quality standards. Every now and then, a unit malfunctions or a customer is not happy with the color or the screen. Another unit, exactly the same, is shipped out as a replacement. All the millions of the gadgets bearing the same product number are all the same and interchangeable.

Now, imagine somewhere in the universe where millions or stars are churned out everyday – all burning with the same intense energy and yet no two stars are quite the same. Imagine in yet another corner of the universe where millions of stars are exploding in their final death throes after having burned themselves out after some millions years. In the process, these stars eject and scatter throughout the universe cosmic debris. And out of this stardust comes asteroids, comets and planets. Imagine in some planets some particles coalescing into living cells and these living cells eventually evolving into beings with consciousness as persons. I wonder if all this ‘manufacturing’ is done according to some ‘manufacturing specifications’. I wonder if the ‘manufactured goods’ are meant for consumers eagerly waiting somewhere to buy them up. Or, is all of this just some fortuitous happening? A chance and happy confluence of quite unrelated events?

Do I see things as just simple being there? Or do I see purpose and meaning in all of this? For some people, the jump from the randomness of life to its being purpose-driven is a simple and easy one. For others, this leap pf faith is just simple too much or too fearful to take. I know my body is made of stardust, remnant of some stars exploding in the past. But I am also aware of a consciousness that cannot be explained by stardust alone. I have a mind that can generate thoughts. And I can hold these thoughts apart from myself. I can think good thoughts and say “I want to be good”. I can think bad thoughts and say “I don’t want to be bad.” I can feel different emotions, sometimes quite independently of my body. In the process, I get the sense that I am unique and one of a kind in all of the complexity around me. I get the sense of a Presence that is always there, deep within me, around me and sustaining me.

In prayerful silence and with deep gratitude, I thank this Presence for revealing himself to me in Christ – that he and his Christ are one.

The Jews took up stones again to stone him. Jesus replied, “I have shown you many good works from the Father. For which of these are you going to stone me?” The Jews answered, “It is not for a good work that we are going to stone you, but for blasphemy, because you, though only a human being, are making yourself God.”. . . . If I am not doing the works of my Father, then do not believe me. But if I do them, even though you do not believe me, believe the works, so that you may know and understand that the Father is in me and I am in the Father.”
John 10: 31-42

Posted in Faith, Nature, Science, Spirituality | Tagged Beginnings, Blessings, Grace, Gratitude, Prayer, Serendipity | Comments Off

Where Everything Comes Together

Posted on March 21, 2013 by Spirit Moments

Today’s world is very secular and it is a very scientific and rational world we live in. Jesus is sometimes seen or dismissed as a myth and his words and teachings are seen as mere superstitions by many. Like, eternal life? That notion is a pipe dream; for nothing lasts forever. When we die, that is the end. But even science declares that matter is indestructible. It merely get transformed into another state. Heaven up the skies? That is a myth. For our up is down for the people in the southern hemisphere of the globe. But science believes in parallel universes, which they can only postulate about but have no clear understanding – yet. My faith tells me that there is a Presence in the universe that makes things happen, often in manner we cannot understand nor fathom. A scientist named Heisenberg observes all this randomness and a seemingly unintelligible universe and formulated his Uncertainty Principle. People believe his theory but miss out on the Presence behind all this randomness and uncertainty. The believer sees that Presence as a loving person, responsible for me being who I am, different and unique with all the other beings who are just as different and unique as I am. Many today would have problem believing in that loving God but would have no problem accepting the Higgs boson, discovered at greats cost and after observing billions of events.

Many today find it hard to believe and accept Christ and his words. But even during his time on earth, people were already saying that he had the devil in him for saying the things that he said and doing the things that he did. That is why they conspired to kill him. And they succeeded. And he rose from the dead as he said he would. But still there were many who would not believe. To this day.

In his time, however, all of these things will come to pass and will come together at Point Omega, where the lion will graze with the lamb and science will find a home in faith. Mythic? Magical? Mystical? No, this is reality for me.

‘Very truly, I tell you, whoever keeps my word will never see death.’
‘Very truly, I tell you, before Abraham was, I am.’
John 8:51-59

Posted in Faith, Life, Presence, Science | Tagged Beginnings, Eternity | Comments Off

The First Day of Spring

Posted on March 20, 2013 by Spirit Moments

The clouds of my depression are lifting up and I am beginning to see the light again. So timely and appropriate that today is the first day of spring. I see this as a recurring pattern in my life: in my aloneness, be it depression or extreme joy, there is a presence that sustains me. I left home at the tender age of eleven when I entered the seminary. For most of my life from then on till I got married, I was alone and by myself. I have had to face sad and difficult moments alone. I have had to deal with defeat and disaster almost entirely on my own. I relished my joys and successes mostly by myself. I guess it was during this period in my life that I discovered prayer. In my aloneness, I found myself talking to myself and then to God about my joys as well as my sorrows. I sought his company in tears as well as in laughter. I talked to him when there was no one to tell my troubles to. I talked to him when there was no one to tell a happy moment in my life.

Being away from home and being alone has done me good. Unwittingly and without really planning it to be this way, my sons have gone through the same formation experience. We left Martin and Mickey all by themselves for most of their high school and college years. Macky went through college and medical school all by his lonesome. I see in them today solid persons who can stand on their own – intellectually, spiritually and financially. In fact, they teach me a lot of things these days. They help sustain me up when I am down. And they are a joy when we are together.

While man has never been meant to live alone, there are moments he has to be alone. Being alone is not isolating myself from others but rather giving space and time for him who is the reason of my being here in the first place.

Thanking the Lord on this first day of spring for the sacred space in my life where I encounter him regularly. And this is the truth for me.

Then Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, ‘If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.’
John 8:31-42

Posted in Life, Nature, Presence, Spirituality | Tagged Being a Father, Choice, Prayer, Wisdom | 2 Comments

California and Its Roots

Posted on March 19, 2013 by Spirit Moments

He was a quiet man, a man of few words. But he was rock solid. He gave his son the name Jesus, who became known by the work of his father – the son of the carpenter. He was sensitive to the promptings of the Spirit, listening to the Spirit’s inspiration when he was most alone with himself – that is in his sleep. Today is the feast day of St. Joseph.

Today, he still works with his son, Jesus in his usual quiet and often unnoticed manner. As patron of the diocese of San Jose, he continues to serve as an inspiration to thousands of working people who would want to live lives of faith, hope and love. In a valley so secular and so driven by science and technology, he helps people bring a sense of the sacred and the divine in their daily lives. In a milieu so steep in materialism and consumerism, his virtues of quiet simplicity and effective humility continues to inspire thousands in the diocese.

California has always been at the leading edge of developments in the US be it in technology, the sciences, the arts, culture and even cuisine. One of the things I love about living here is the fact many people miss or refuse to see. California is also deeply steep in spirituality and the sacred – thanks to the rich Catholic heritage from its past. The missions are an essential part of the local landscape. Every other town or city has been named in the honor of some holy person or the Blessed Virgin Mary. And Catholics, be they immigrants or born and raised here, have always been major players and contributors to what California has achieved. San Francisco, now made even more famous because the new Pope has chosen the name of its patron, St. Francis of Assisi. Santa Clara, home to a great Jesuit university. Los Angeles. San Diego. Santa Barbara. San Miguel. Traveling through California can be one long prayer and a deeply spiritual experience indeed.

When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife.
Matthew 1:16-24

Posted in Discipleship, Science, Spirituality | Tagged Being a Father, Blessings, joy | Comments Off