“It Takes a Village to Raise a Child.”

Posted on April 27, 2013 by Spirit Moments

“It takes a village to raise a child.” says an African proverb. I have always been amazed by the interconnectedness of life, how everyone and everything are intimately linked and intertwined with one another. I am the sum total of all the people I have met and all the events I have been through. I carry in my present everything from my past. And yet I am totally new, every single cell in me is renewed and replaced every five years, ready for the future. There is thread that runs through my past, my present and my future. It is the same thread that runs through the lives of all people. This thread goes all the way back to our Source and Origin and forward to our final home and destination. And this thread is the connection that allows us to share in the life coming from that Source.

People and even things share in the nature of their source. As I watch our family grow, it is often unnerving to realize that there is so much being handed down from one generation to another. There is so much of Martin I see in Jonathan. There is so much of me I see in Jane. As we grow older, I am becoming more and more like Tatang and Anabelle is becoming more like Mama – for better or for worse. And all of a sudden I find a newer and deeper meaning to my wedding vows to love and to hold, for better or worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health.

This is what Christ was also telling his disciples all the time he was with them: see me, see my Source; know me, know the Father who is my Source. In turn, he says: if you want to see me, see me in my brothers and sister; if you want to serve me, serve me in the least of my brothers and sisters. It all makes sense intellectually. The real challenge is to live it out in what I do.

Philip said to him, ‘Lord, show us the Father, and we will be satisfied.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Have I been with you all this time, Philip, and you still do not know me? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, “Show us the Father”? Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me?
John 14:7-14

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The Way, the Truth and the Life

Posted on April 26, 2013 by Spirit Moments

It is a joy to learn and discover new things everyday even as I grow older. And as every new day dawns, I see subtle changes happening in me. I used to live my life in minutes and hours, in days and years. Now, I live my life in moments and memories. I can recall vividly and in surprising details things and events from my past. But I often have a hard time trying to remember what I did yesterday or even just an hour ago. (Actually, I was asleep.) In my younger years, tomorrow would not come soon enough for me. The future always took so long in coming, specially when I was waiting for Christmas or my birthday or I was looking forward to an important or exciting event. Today, the future comes even before I am done with living out today. I wish I could slow down the coming of tomorrow.

These days, the past and the future all seemed jumbled up and blended into today. I have a growing feeling of everything somehow coming together, converging into some reality. I have a vague feeling of being familiar with this reality but at the same time wondering what it is all about. It is like coming to the end of a beautiful novel and all the loose ends are being tied up one by one, all the conflicts coming to a resolution. Yet, there is the exhilarating feeling that there might yet be another denouement just around the corner, another unexpected twist, a surprise ending perhaps. I am living through truly exciting times.

I imagine the apostles and disciples during the last days of Jesus on earth. The last few days have been a roller coaster ride for them: the passion, the crucifixion, the empty tomb and the resurrection. Now, he is about to go back to the Father. They are starting to feel lost again. He says he is the Way. They are starting to feel that what they have been through was nothing but an illusion, perhaps even a lie. He says he is the Truth. They are starting to fear for their lives again; with Jesus gone, the Jews could very well come after them (and they will.) He say he is Life.

What comforting words to hear at the end of any story.

Thomas said to him, ‘Lord, we do not know where you are going. How can we know the way?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’
John 14:1-6

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The Rhythm of Life

Posted on April 25, 2013 by Spirit Moments

We are  called in faith to become a community of believers and then we are sent out to proclaim and share that call with the whole creation. The rhythm that sustains life is the same rhythm that builds our faith.

Life is sustained by the continuous alternation of opposite and contrasting movements: we breathe in, then breathe out; we take in food and water, then we pass out waste. Muscles contract and then relax to perform their functions. Valves in the body open and close to regulate the body. In the greater scheme of things, tides ebb and flow when the moon waxes and wanes; galaxies expand and then collapse.

This rhythm, to my mind, is nothing more that the whole of creation pulsing to the beat of its creator. He taught us that to be born again we must first die; that to gain life one must first lose it; that the first shall be last and the last shall be first; that the greatest is the smallest and the smallest is the greatest. He says “Come to me.” and invites us to a relationship; then he says “Go and proclaim.” the love he has planted within our innermost being.

And he said to them, ‘Go into all the world and proclaim the good news to the whole creation.’ Mark 16:15-20

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Still On My Lost Wallet

Posted on April 24, 2013 by Spirit Moments

We are creatures of habit. I looked at the drawer where Anabelle found my lost wallet several times but I did not notice it. The top of that drawer was not one of the usual places where I would usually – habitually – put down my wallet. I looked at that place and of course I did not see the wallet because it was not supposed to be there. I searched thoroughly and several times over the usual places and of course did not find the missing wallet. My usual routine in the morning is to bring Jonathan and Jane to school and Martin to the train station. There are times during the day when I have to go out to run some errands. There are many times I would find myself driving to the kids’ schools or Martin’s train station and then I realize I was supposed to be driving elsewhere.

I wake up in the morning, happy to see another day but taking it for granted. The sun did not owe it to me to come up this morning. I take for granted the fact that I woke up is the gift of yet another day. I take so many things for granted: newspaper at our doorstep in the morning, mail delivered in the mailbox, food available on the table, movies at the mall for our entertainment. The people who made all these accessible to me probably did them out of habit and because it is their job to do so. Still, they could have chosen not to. The freedom they have is still an indication of the love there is for me.

I can also put love in the routine and habitual things that I do: driving for the family, running errands, doing housework, writing blogs, teaching, going to school, hiking. I shall consciously do these out of love for the people I do them for – complete with the sweet emotions I usually associate with loving. Saint Thérèse of Lisieux, one of the greatest saints in modern times, did not anything epically heroic. She did very ordinary things extraordinarily by doing them consciously with love.

Jesus cried aloud, ‘Whoever believes in me believes not in me but in him who sent me. And whoever sees me sees him who sent me. I have come as light into the world, so that everyone who believes in me should not remain in the darkness. I do not judge anyone who hears my words and does not keep them, for I came not to judge the world, but to save the world.
John 12:44-50

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Right Before My Very Eyes

Posted on April 23, 2013 by Spirit Moments

The other day I couldn’t find my wallet and I was totally distraught. I looked everywhere and I couldn’t locate it. I was in panic thinking back where I could have left it or dropped it the night before. But I was certain I had it with me when I came home. I asked Anabelle’s help and she is very good in finding things –  with the help of St. Anthony. And in no time at all, she found the missing wallet on top of one of our drawers, which I passed by several times in my search.

To miss something or even someone who is right there before my very eyes – is this a seniors thing as i grow older or is it plain stubbornness in me? I  look for happiness and it is staring me in the face all the time. All I have to do is reach out for it. I search for meaning in my life and it is happening all around all the time. All I have to do is to be in the moment. I craved for success and I was right smack in the middle of it. I only come to realize and appreciate it when others tell me about it.

I long to see and touch and hear God’s presence. But there is only silence. All of nature is charged with the grandeur of God. All of creation see his praise. I can touch and feel the love he has planted in everyone of the people who have come into my life and have touched me to the core. Yet, like the Jews I ask: “How long will you keep us in suspense? If you are the Christ, tell us plainly.”

In my heart, I know my Savior lives. Yet, I refuse to listen to my heart. I often listen only to my head. In my gut, I know I was born for greater things and that the best is still to come. Yet, I would seek a rational reason for everything I do. Believing makes sense (that sentiment is a from my heart) but it is so difficult to live it out (that is a conclusion from my head.)

So the Jews gathered round him and said to him, “How long will you keep us in suspense? If you are the Christ, tell us plainly.” Jesus answered them, “I told you, and you do not believe. The works that I do in my Father’s name, they bear witness to me; but you do not believe, because you do not belong to my sheep. My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me; and I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish, and no one shall snatch them out of my hand.
John 10:22-30

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Voices

Posted on April 22, 2013 by Spirit Moments

People who hear voices are often labelled as crazy or lunatics. But I hear voices often. I do many crazy things but I am sure of my sanity. Still, I do often hear voices. Like, I often hear that little voice in me gently reminding me to do good, to seek what is true and to celebrate the beautiful. There is a persistent voice that tells me I was born for greater things and the best is yet to come even as I stand at the portals of death. One voice I am particularly attentive to. I often carry on a conversation with a Presence who challenges me to become better and changes me to a new creation. And I respond with faith, trust and gratitude.

Yet, I also hear other voices that tell me otherwise. Grating, unpleasant and just as persistent are voices that would drive me into fits of jealousy and envy over the good others, that would have me deal in lies to subvert the truth, that would make me behave so pridefully and selfishly to fail to see the beauty around me and in others, that would induce me to wallow in laziness or greed or mediocrity. And there are times that I give in to these voices.

Even now, there are people who are in pain who need to hear the voice of comforting words. There are those who are lost or overwhelmed by life’s vicissitudes and they are longing for a voice that would  lead them to the path of light and inspiration. There are those who have nothing but the shirt in their back and they are waiting for a voice that would bring them help. And there are those without voice, who are among the least, the lost and the last, and they are in need of someone who would lend them their voices. I shall lend them my voice by sharing whatever of the good, the true and the beautiful that I have. I have received these so abundantly from the Presence whose voice I hear within me and I shall share these generously to all I can.

‘The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep hear his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes ahead of them, and the sheep follow him because they know his voice. They will not follow a stranger, but they will run from him because they do not know the voice of strangers.’
John 10:1-10

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The Good Shepherd

Posted on April 21, 2013 by Spirit Moments

Image There has always been a hunger and thirst in the human soul that no material goods or possessions can ever sate. At the heart of this hunger is the gnawing human insecurity that in the grand scheme of things, I am nothing. Marveling at the vastness of the oceans, man is nothing but a piece to flesh tossed upon the waves. Standing in the shadows of massive mountains, man is no more than another clump of dust and pebbles. Cowering in fear before storm and thunder, man is just like another leaf blown in the wind.

Yet, in the midst of all this grandeur and in spite of his smallness in the face of it all, man hears a voice deep inside him that there is someone who assures him he shall not want. And he doesn’t. That in spite of the fragility and uncertainty of life, he will find still waters where he is restored. And he does. Just as a tender shoot struggles to grow on the mountainside and in the face of the fierce winds coming from the sea, so does man find a place that has been prepared just for him, where his cup overflows.

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want;
he makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters;
he restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness
for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil; for thou art with me;
thy rod and thy staff,they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
thou anointest my head with oil,my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life;
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Sheep do not have the mind and intelligence that men have. But they have a heart that tells them who their shepherd is. They do not reason out that the shepherd is feeding them only to make meat of them later. They just trust that the shepherd has nothing but their good in mind. I have both intelligence and heart with which to know and seek my own Good Shepherd.

“My sheep hear my voice. I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish.”
John 10:27-30

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The True Cost of Discipleship

Posted on April 20, 2013 by Spirit Moments

It only takes a lost or misplaced wallet for me to lose all calm and equanimity. I t reminds me of a line in a poem I learn when I was young: ” it is east to fight when everything is right and you are mad with the thrill and the glory. . . . It’s a different song when everything is wrong and you are feeling infernally mortal.”

In many ways my being a disciple is still on the intellectual and rational level. When things are thrown into a turmoil, like a lost wallet, I lose all composure and I find it hard to pray and I feel like turning my back and no longer walk the path of discipleship. I am among the seeds that fell on the wayside.

Lord, I need your Presence now and fill me with your peace.

Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him. So Jesus asked the twelve, ‘Do you also wish to go away?’ Simon Peter answered him, ‘Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.’
John 6:66-69

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Paradox and Mystery

Posted on April 19, 2013 by Spirit Moments

We live in a world of paradox and mystery.

In the grand cosmic scale of things, it is total chaos out there: galaxies exploding, planets and stars constantly colliding or being sucked into massive black holes. It is no different in the submicroscopic level of quantum physics: particles in constant flurry of random motions and constant collisions. And yet, in our everyday experience of life, everything is orderly and the law of cause and effect reigns supreme: the sun rises every morning to herald a new day, the lakes and the forests and the mountains are where they should be to shelter and nurture life in all its variations, the rains fall and the winds blow to enable an atmosphere of sustainable life, flowers bloom and the birds sing to add to the beauty with which the earth aglow. It is a paradox to have chaos and randomness co-existing with order and beauty in the same time and space. Why and who and how that is possible is a total mystery.

Sandwiched between cosmic chaos and quantum randomness, I marvel at the beauty and order around me. Looking at the stunning effects of his handiwork, I stand in awe of the Creator who made all of this possible. But beyond knowing that he is there constantly present, I cannot with my finite mind truly know this God, this Presence unless he reveals himself to me.

And he has revealed himself to men – in paradox and mystery. He talks to me in paradoxes and I can see the meaning of his words: dying to be born again, being last to be first, serving and being humble in order to be great, pardoning in order to be pardoned, giving in order to receive. What he tells me is a mystery and yet it brings me fullness of life: eat my flesh, drink my blood, do good to those who hate you, turn the other cheek, carry your cross.

Tossed between the chaos of the cosmos and the randomness of subatomic particles, I encounter God in the order and beauty of the my everyday life.

Jesus said to them, ‘Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink. Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them.
John 6:52-56

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Misplaced Anxieties

Posted on April 18, 2013 by Spirit Moments

I have always been hungry for affirmation and public adulation. And somehow, I have always gotten it. I love being the center of attention for something I have done, or something I have said, or simply just being funny or charming. Yet, I am basically a shy person. I would generally shun public attention for fear of failing, being laughed at or not being paid attention to.

This craving for attention, affirmation, even for exultation, seems like an insatiable hunger that could never be filled or a thirst that could never be quenched. Last night was our last class at the ILM and it was an evaluation session of our past three years together. Everyone agreed it was a great program and that all of us have become better persons because of it. We have been intellectually challenged, spiritually nourished and emotionally strengthened through our time together. We have become a small community of learners and believers.

As my classmates were gushing with positive comments and very useful suggestions and comments, I was struggling in my seat. I was looking for something smart to say that would draw attention to myself and be admired for it; but I was tongue-tied during the whole time. I did not know what to say. I even felt like I was not with the class. All of a sudden I felt like a stranger in roomful of friends, an outsider in a closely-knit community. I realized my hunger for recognition and need for affirmation was the root cause of my feeling alienation at that moment.

I needed to get away from myself to heal myself of the disappointment I was experiencing. Moments of humility and living in ordinariness bring me to a realization that my hunger and thirst is self-inflicted. And in the midst of my inner turmoil, I was reminded of St. Teresa’s mantra: “Nada te turbe. Solo Dios basta.”

I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Whoever eats of this bread will live forever; and the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.
John 6:44-51

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