The First Day of Spring

The clouds of my depression are lifting up and I am beginning to see the light again. So timely and appropriate that today is the first day of spring. I see this as a recurring pattern in my life: in my aloneness, be it depression or extreme joy, there is a presence that sustains me. I left home at the tender age of eleven when I entered the seminary. For most of my life from then on till I got married, I was alone and by myself. I have had to face sad and difficult moments alone. I have had to deal with defeat and disaster almost entirely on my own. I relished my joys and successes mostly by myself. I guess it was during this period in my life that I discovered prayer. In my aloneness, I found myself talking to myself and then to God about my joys as well as my sorrows. I sought his company in tears as well as in laughter. I talked to him when there was no one to tell my troubles to. I talked to him when there was no one to tell a happy moment in my life.

Being away from home and being alone has done me good. Unwittingly and without really planning it to be this way, my sons have gone through the same formation experience. We left Martin and Mickey all by themselves for most of their high school and college years. Macky went through college and medical school all by his lonesome. I see in them today solid persons who can stand on their own – intellectually, spiritually and financially. In fact, they teach me a lot of things these days. They help sustain me up when I am down. And they are a joy when we are together.

While man has never been meant to live alone, there are moments he has to be alone. Being alone is not isolating myself from others but rather giving space and time for him who is the reason of my being here in the first place.

Thanking the Lord on this first day of spring for the sacred space in my life where I encounter him regularly. And this is the truth for me.

Then Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, ‘If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.’
John 8:31-42