Masks And Reality

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There is no one so blind as one who refuses to see;
and no one harder to wake up as one who pretends to sleep.
Often, I live my life with different masks on and with a lot of pretensions.
Like, I sometimes show people a happy face when deep inside I am hurting.
I can mistake form for substance like doing prayers regularly
but not changing what ought to be changed in me.

I am grateful for the many blessings I have received.
It is with humility that I acknowledge these,
not because I have deserved them for the good I might have done;
but because life itself is generous;
because there is a God who has created a giving rather than a taking universe.
Like, the sun tirelessly gives off light.
So, should I be in generosity.
The stars constantly emit their energy.
So, should my giving be constant and consistent.
Even plants and trees continuously give us their oxygen to breathe.
So, thus should my love and service to others.

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Be Not Like Whitened Sepulchres

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Jesus said,
“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites.
You are like whitened sepulchres, which appear beautiful on the outside,
but inside are full of dead men’s bones and every kind of filth.
Even so, on the outside you appear righteous,
but inside you are filled with hypocrisy and evildoing.

No one is to be feared more than one who speaks with absolute certainty.
I am wary of people who speak out of their power,
be it political, financial or even intellectual power.
Often, people with power think that might is right and that is an fearsome thought
that have driven people to war and violence against the weak.
People who act with absolute certainty often have no qualms of conscience.
I’d rather be beset with doubts, uncertainties, and even inconsistencies;
and act based on a reasonable certainty and leave everything else to God.

My faith tells me there is power outside myself that eschews violence and oppression
but would have us live in freedom and love.
But my faith is not an absolute certainty.
I work on it in “fear and trembling”.
I am often beset by “What ifs” even in the face
of all the beauty and affirmations around me.
I pray that I am not numbered among the “hypocrites”.

 

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Be Not a Hypocrite

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There is a lot of doublespeak in the world today.
People say one thing to hide what they really mean,
sometimes saying one thing to signify the exact opposite of what they are saying.
There is a lot of politically correct words and phrases
as well as euphemisms to hide the ugliness and pain present behind truth and reality.

Christ spoke the most inspiring words.
But he was also one who wouldn’t mince words in describing people and reality.
He had the harshest words for hypocrites, whose words did not match their deeds.
In fact, this would eventually get him crucified.
It takes great character and deep groundings in principles to be able to do that.

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites.
You pay tithes of mint and dill and cummin,
and have neglected the weightier things of the law:
judgment and mercy and fidelity.”

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Being True to One’s Deepest Self

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In this weary world we live in, full of restless lives and fervent hopes and dreams,
I need to constantly affirm what I believe in.
I believe that light is stronger than darkness,
that love always triumphs over anger and hatred,
that life is more powerful than death.
Through my dark moments, I struggle towards the light.
In the face of fear, anger and hatred, I walk and work in love.
In death, I see the rebirth of all that I hold dear and long for.

I believe that light is but the reflection of the divine presence that energizes us all.
I believe that love is alive in my relationships with others,
without whom my own life and continuing existence would not be possible.
I believe there is more to life than what I can immediately see or perceive
and that there is a lot more about it I need to know, learn and understand.
I believe these moments are the promptings of the power
that has culled me out of non-being into existence, from darkness into light
and from insignificance to a life of meaning and relationships.

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Discipleship and Discipline

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Life is the greatest gift I have received. Because I am alive, everything and anything is possible for me. If I have everything, what else can I ask for from the Lord except to be eternally grateful for the precious gift of life he had gratuitously given me.

And yet, I ask for so many thing in prayer. I ask for a life of ease and comfort, of leisure and pleasure, not realizing that these are all mine for the taking or the making. I only need to look around to see what I am seeking for.

In time of pain and adversity, I cry out to the Lord to save me from my misery. And yet he has already given me everything I need to overcome suffering. He gave my mind to find the solutions I need. He gave me a heart to give me courage to pursue the solutions I have discovered. He gave me my body for the muscles and strength I need to make the solutions I have conceived happen.

The many times he has answered my prayers, I have thanked him almost as an afterthought. I would often do so while patting myself at the back, thinking what a good person I have been for God to have answered my prayers. And my sense of entitlement grows worse, not realizing that I should be down on my knees in humility and gratitude to such a munificent and all-loving God.

If I look over my entire life, it was in fact in those moments of pain and suffering, those times that I dared to carry the cross that I accepted when I followed Christ that I have truly encountered and found God. It was at my lowest and most desolate moments that I truly found and encountered God. It was in my emptiness that I felt God filling me up. It was in my darkest moments that God shone his light upon my confused mind. It was in my utter desolation that I found myself humbly thanking him for all the graces and blessing he has poured upon me.

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Suscipe

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A good friend comes home to the Philippines from Texas where he has been a resident for the past decade or so. He visits familiar places and sees familiar faces. Something in him gets rekindled. A fire that was once burning inside gets him to start thinking what he can do for the country – again.

Young students from grade schools reap laurels for the country in various international competitions. Young millennial entrepreneurs break new grounds in eco-tourism, the arts, and science. And they get recognition for their work. New breed of politicians buck the trend of corruption and self-serving governance to lead with principles and dedicated service. These young people keeps the light burning that the youth are the hope of the fatherland.

A small group of seniors getting together regularly to reminisce and remember, often around the Eucharistic table. They still discuss animatedly what contributions can they still make for Community, Church and Country. They keep fanning the dying embers to keep their faith, hope and love alive and burning.

On the other hand, just when one thinks that things couldn’t get any worse, a man convicted of heinous crimes – note, crimes – is being given parole and will go scot-free. This is on top of convicted plunders being released from prison and self-confessed drug dealers released from prison while suspected small time drug dealers are killed and a senator accused of drug dealing languishes in prison.

It is easy to have faith and be hopeful when on hears stories like the first three. But can I keep my faith, hope and love even in the face of evil seemingly triumphing over good? Can I still call on God with love and trust even when overwhelmed by disasters and vexed by difficulties? Or, am I just a fair-weather believer?

I will keep my faith and hold the Lord to his promise: “You will see greater things than this.”  The Lord giveth; the Lord taketh away. Whatever he send me, I will stay in his love. I make as my own this radical prayer of St. Ignatius:

Take and receive, O Lord, my liberty
Take all my will, my mind, my memory
All things I hold and all I own are thine
Thine was the gift to thee I all resign

To thou direct and govern all and sway
Do what Thou wilt, command, and I obey
Only Thy grace Thy love on me bestow
These make me rich, all else will I forego

Mas ramdamang hugot ng mga kataggang ito sa ating sariling wika:

Kunin Mo, O Diyos, at tanggapin Mo
Ang aking kalayaan, ang aking kalooban
Isip at gunita ko, lahat ng hawak ko,
Ng loob ko ay aking alay sa ‘Yo

Nagmula sa ‘Yo ang lahat ng ito
Muli kong handog sa ‘Yo
Patnubayan Mo’t paghariang lahat
Ayon sa kalooban Mo
Mag utos Ka, Panginoon ko
Dagling tatalima ako
Ipagkaloob Mo lang ang pag-ibig Mo
At lahat ay tatalikdan ko
Tatalikdan ko

 

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Idealism

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I have always been a dreamer, an idealist. I sometimes imagine myself as one little candle trying to dispel as much darkness as I can.
Humbly, I acknowledge that I have received this light as a gift, freely and unmerited.
And I have shared this light through my work of teaching to dispel the darkness of ignorance;
through my engagements in healthcare to dispel the darkness that comes with the pain of sickness.
If I should be remembered I would want it to be for the people I have mentored, taught and helped change their lives;
and for the people who lives I have helped put back together and made whole again either physically, spiritually and psychologically.
And as I go into my latter years, all this caring comes back to me more focused as I share in helping care from those closest to me to the strangers whom I serve anonymously.
As I help teach and make them whole and more complete, I remember and pray for all of the people who have taught me and  made me whole and complete.

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Death, Be Not Proud

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I have always sought to live a life with meaning. And these days, I also think a lot about dying a death with meaning. Ninoy Aquino, whose death – murder – we remembered yesterday, lived a life full of meaning. But it was his death that had greater significance and meaning. “The Filipino is worth dying for.”

I remember one time when our eldest grandchild simply broke into tears because he, all of a sudden, felt afraid of dying. He was all of eight years old.

Man has always been afraid of death and death is indeed a sad occasion. It helps and even inspires me to think that death is not an end but another passage that I make in life. My life is a series of passages or passing over. Birth is a passage from non-existence into being. In life, I pass over from childhood into adulthood. In death, I pass over into a new life. Before my birth, I could have imagined myself to be afraid to leave the comforts of the womb, uncertain of what lay ahead. In death, I could imagine myself to be afraid to leave life, uncertain of what is waiting for me ahead. But it is precisely in the paradox of dying that I make the passage, the passing over, the being born to a new life in eternity. My Christian faith assures me of that certainty.

As I advance in years, my thoughts often turn to thoughts about death. Strangely, I am not afraid of death for I see it not as an end but as a portal for levelling up; or at the very least, for a ‘Reset’. Just as in a video game, the action gets more exciting as you near the end;  one must make sure to have enough points or energy to level up. So, every day brings me new challenges and deeper realizations as I approach the end-game.

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Jeremiads Over A Failed Revolution

No photo description available.On August 21, 1983, many of the streets of Manila were festooned with yellow ribbons to welcome back Ninoy Aquino from his exile in the US. History was made that day when he was assassinated while getting off the plane that brought him to Manila. His killing triggered a chain of events that eventually led to the EDSA Revolution of 1986.

When historians write out Philippine History of that period, they will probably be writing of actually two revolutions: the Bagong Lipunan Revolution of Marcos and the EDSA Revolution of Aquino. Both radically changed the course of Philippine History and both are still being played out till now.

By their fruits you shall know them?

Looking at what is currently happening in the country today, I am tempted to say that the Marcos Revolution has been the more successful one. Because of the massive corruption and human rights abuses by the dictatorship, it succeeded in galvanizing the country and uniting a very fractious nation for once in their history. We ousted Marcos through the peaceful EDSA Revolution. We did ourselves proud and showed the world what courage and nobility Filipinos are capable of. EDSA became the template of later People Power revolutions that toppled most of the authoritarian regimes in Europe that included the dismantling of the old USSR.

The Aquino Presidency came into into power on a moral high ground. It tried to govern based on values and principles. There were many who joined government with reforms and renewal in their minds. but alas, it was an uphill battle. The Cory Presidency was beset and buffeted by a never ending series of coup d’etat. It survived its term of six years but it seemed that it was all downhill from there. For there was the internal threat of people not really wanting changes. The people who were led out of slavery wanted to go back to the fleshpots of their place of enslavement.

Like the Israelites wanted to go back to the fleshpots of Egypt, people grumbled and complained. The road built of principles and values was not only difficult and steep to negotiate, it was also long and winding. People were impatient. They wanted shortcuts. It also meant that some of those who were in power were losing their entitlements. They would not take that sitting down. Even as reforms were being attempted, there were many still managing to get away with shenanigans. And soon everyone wanted a share of the loot. In the end, nothing has changed. Things have gotten worse. And being pushed to their logical conclusions, they have become even ridiculous in their irrationality and insanity.

So are we better off today or worse off? There are people I respect for their intelligence and uprightness who say things are better. Let us just help and do what we can to help the country. I am greatly distressed by what I see. I see the utter lack of principles and values in high places and thing going from bad to worse. And so many people just being resigned and trying to make the best out of a terrible situation.

And as always I cling to my faith. I cling to my God who writes straight with crooked lines. I cling to Him who is a contrarian God, who created us out of nothing, who fashioned man out of stardust, who calls us to the cross, and who in the last few days have consistently been sending me the same message:

Do you think that I have come to establish peace on the earth? 
No, I tell you, but rather division. 

“If you wish to be perfect, go,
sell what you have and give to the poor,
and you will have treasure in heaven.
Then come, follow me.”

“Amen, I say to you, it will be hard for one who is rich
to enter the Kingdom of heaven.
Again I say to you,
it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle
than for one who is rich to enter the Kingdom of God.”

Thus, the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

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Poverty as a Choice

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Two days ago, Jesus declared:
“Do you think that I have come to establish peace on the earth? 
No, I tell you, but rather division.” 

Yesterday, he told the young man:
“If you wish to be perfect, go,
sell what you have and give to the poor,
and you will have treasure in heaven.
Then come, follow me.”
When the young man heard this statement, he went away sad,
for he had many possessions.

Today, Jesus said to his disciples:

“Amen, I say to you, it will be hard for one who is rich
to enter the Kingdom of heaven.”

Are riches really that bad?
Just consider, there is inherently unjust when the richest one percent of the world’s population owns more than what the lower fifty percent has.
Or, there is something not right when the three richest men in the US (Gates, Bezos, Warren) own as much wealth as the bottom half of the US population, or 160 million people. Any one of these three is has more wealth than entire countries among the lower fifty percent of the world’s countries.

Gates and Buffet sees the moral crisis in their owning such an obscene amount of wealth. they are ready to give away what they have through their philanthropy. But this will hardly solve the problem.

Even now, there are many who are willing to sell their soul to the devil to get to riches they lust after. They are will to steal, kill, con, do whatever it takes to get their hands on riches. And the world condones and even celebrated their success. Such people exist everywhere – in business, in entertainment, in politics and government and yes, even in churches and religion.

So are we in a hopeless situation?
Today’s Gospel offers us this consolation”
“For men this is impossible,
but for God all things are possible.”

Have the words of God fallen on deaf ears?
There are still does who choose to hear, listen and follow his Words.
Their numbers are small but they are around.

Anabelle and I had a friend who was a Poor Clare cloistered nun.
I remembered one time she was telling us that they do not change clothes everyday
but wear the same set of habits for several days.
They would sleep with their whole habit on so that they do not waste time
dressing and getting ready for their prayer times.
I asked if this was to save on clothing or on the laundry expenses,
knowing they had vows of poverty.
She said it was indeed because of their vow of poverty but not to save but to be in solidarity with the real poor, who may have just one set of clothing in their life
or who may not have anything to wear at all.

As long as there as Tessa’s who take on poverty as a choice,
I will not lose hope and I will always believe that good will triumph over evil
and that love will eventually conquer all the hatred and anger in the world.

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