Genuine Generosity

I have great admiration for people who can give generously and do so very spontaneously with expecting any rewards nor counting the cost. I hate myself most when I hold back in being a giving and generous person and first think what is in it for me. I would come up with all sorts of rationalizations for not giving and holding back, like “he does not deserve it”;  “you are not helping her any”; “he is so ungrateful”; “she will only abuse your generosity”.

I can sometimes imagine myself being generous even to the point of giving up my life for another in one glorious moment in an extreme situation, like if someone were dying or in danger. It is the daily demands and practice of generosity that truly test whether my generosity is genuine. Can I give and be generous even when I am hurting? Can I give to another even when I harbor ill feelings against that person? In the daily grind of life, can I be generous without counting the cost or asking for a reward?

It is a hard lesson to learn but generosity is good for the spirit. When I give to others, it is like getting rid of all the rusty accretions in my soul in order to make myself clean again. When I give away my time, talent and treasure, it is like peeling away unwanted layers in my personality so that the real me can emerge. When I give to others, I affirm the value and the inherent goodness that here in them. In the process, goodness triumphs over evil – in small ways maybe but which in time will change me and change the world.

“Dearest Lord, teach me to be generous,
teach me to serve you as I should,
to give and not to count the cost,
to fight and not to heed the wounds,
to toil and not to seek for rest,
to labor and ask not for reward,
save that of knowing that I do your most holy will.”

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Anyone who gives you a cup of water to drink
because you belong to Christ,
amen, I say to you, will surely not lose his reward.”
Mark 9:41