Seventy times seven – that is how often we are asked to forgive. In one word, always.
But does love always have to go with forgiveness? If I love someone, I will always find it in my heart to forgive. But do I have to love everyone I forgive? I have been hurt or harmed by many people in my life: at work, by friends, by family, sometimes inadvertently, sometimes maliciously. Most, I have forgiven because I love them and I want them still to be part of my life. A few, I have forgiven but have sworn not to have anything to do with them ever again in my life. Is that real forgiveness?
I know refusing to forgive enslaves me and allows my anger and bitterness to tie me down. That is why I make it a point to forgive everyone who has offended me; otherwise refusing to do so would only allow the anger and bitterness to fester and cause even more pain. And knowing that I am myself sinful, I am also in need of forgiveness. As much as I can, I say sorry when I have offended someone. But there are times I am not even aware that I have offended someone out of my denseness and insensitivity.
I pray for magnanimity, generosity and love to forgive all who have offended me. I pray for courage and humility to ask forgiveness of those I have offended.
Then his lord summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. Should you not have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?’ And in anger his lord handed him over to be tortured until he would pay his entire debt. So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
Matthew 18:21-35
Interesting, I’d have to say that “love” is a big word, and it depends on your definition. To some, showing love is forgiving. Great post.
Thanks for your comment, Kevin. It is a question I am really struggling with right now: I can forgive one who has offended me. But do I also have to love that person? Right now, it is very difficult for me to do both.