I had a very strange dream early this morning. I was driving on the freeway, negotiating a curve, when a strong crosswind blew in with full force. This sent my car hurtling into space. As I felt the car flying out of control and slowly turning over, I told myself: “Oh my god, this is the end. Lord, not yet!” I was just waiting for the next thing to happen: either the lights would go out or I would see a bright light ahead of me. Then, O told myself: “No, this is but a dream. Wake up! Wake up!” And I did, panting with my heart beating like crazy.
Life is very fragile. One gust of wind can send me hurtling into kingdom come. And yet at that moment, I felt I had my life in the cusp of my palm, ready to offer it to the Lord of Life or to give an accounting of the life I have been gifted with. All my life, I have felt special and one of kind because of the gift of life I have received. I was not born into wealth nor privileged. Yet, I have always felt I am beloved by some one who brought me into this world. I am eternally grateful to Ima and Tatang for parenting me; they were the instruments the Lord And Giver of Life had used to bring me forth. And all my life, I have heard this small voice always telling me: “You are my beloved.” It is the same small voice that constantly tell me to take care of the precious gift I have received; that tells me to make it grow and become better; that tells me to treasure it as well in others; that tells me to share it generously just as I have received it from generosity. I am not delusional. I am in touch in reality. I can function normally with others and even when I am by myself. Sometimes, I choose to shut down that voice but it is my constant companion.
This little voice is my affirmation of my worth and value. There may be millions of tress int he forest but I feel I am an outstanding one when I listen to this little voice within me. I look at my past and see how blessed indeed has my life and I am filled with love and gratitude. I look at the future and get assured in trust and hope that there are more good things and blessings waiting for me.
Now when all the people were baptized, and when Jesus also had been baptized and was praying, the heaven was opened, and the Holy Spirit descended upon him in bodily form like a dove. And a voice came from heaven, ‘You are my Son, the Beloved; with you I am well pleased.’ Luke 3:15-16,21-22