Yesterday, as I was driving Jonathan to school with Martin, I made a left turn signal only to go straight and drive ahead on four-way stop intersection. It was a good thing that the lady in the car coming in the opposite direction was nice and gracious. She simply smiled and made room for my lapse. Anabelle often misplaces her eyeglasses, only to find them sitting right in front of her. Such incidents are among the ‘heartaches’ of growing old: doing what I have not intended to do, looking without seeing what I am looking for, listening but not understanding what is being said. There are times I also feel old age creeping into my soul. These are the times when I give in to jadedness and cynicism. How I envy and continuously marvel at Jonathan and Jane. They always see the world afresh and with unending wonder. Their curiosity is boundless and every experience is something they truly relish. In laughter and glee, they would often say: “Wow, let’s do that again.” Cynical old me would often say: “Oh no, here we go again.”
Moments of prayer and silent meditation help me keep my cynicism and jadedness in check. I am awed and sit in wonder as I reflect on the wonderful things God is making happen to me and in my life.
Then turning to the disciples, Jesus said to them privately, ‘Blessed are the eyes that see what you see! For I tell you that many prophets and kings desired to see what you see, but did not see it, and to hear what you hear, but did not hear it.’ Luke 10:21-24